I've got nothing for you today. I'm still dealing with the aftermath from yesterday's sex toy post. How do you follow a post like that? Last night I was making cranberry relish and baking bread and being very domestic. That's me, I go from sex toys to baking bread without a blink. As I was cooking I started chatting on Twitter between tasks. (See? A multi-tasker!)
You know what I learned? Even men love sex toys. Men are very intrigued even with the toys designed for women. After reading my comments, emails, and twitters I now know my female readers are a bunch of horny bitches. I knew there was a reason why I liked all of you so much.
I'm thinking my next blog giveaway may need to be a sex toy. What do you think? Would you be interested? Or would I end up with an extra toy on my hands? (I really think I've got plenty of toys for myself already!)
I've got to say, I have the best readers in the entire world-wide-web. Your comments yesterday cracked me up.
Particularly this one from
Amy in regard to my fondness for my new Flipper. Amy knew all the words to the old Flipper TV song:
They call him Flipper, Flipper, faster than lightning,
No-one you see, is smarter than he,
And we know Flipper, lives in a world full of wonder,
Flying there-under, under the sea!
Everyone loves the king of the sea,
Ever so kind and gentle is he,
Tricks he will do when children appear,
And how they laugh when he's near!
They call him Flipper, Flipper, faster than lightning,
No-one you see, is smarter than he,
And we know Flipper, lives in a world full of wonder,
Flying there-under, under the sea!
The other comment that made me snort coffee all over my new MacBook was Jan's suggestion regarding a new movie titled [email protected] Does Money Town. I'm still not over that email! Hee hee ... laughing just writing about it. Really Jan? If you only knew all the folks in Money Town! Ha ha ha!!
I also laughed at how strongly a few of you felt about certain songs needing to be on the Sex CD. Some of you were simply outraged at the thought of your favorite sex songs not being included. Remember, I did say I only mentioned a few of the songs in my post. There are 19 songs on the CD and I only listed 7. You can relax, most likely your favorite sex song was included.
I got a couple emails from people asking if I was prepared for the "fall out" in my real life from writing a post about sex toys. The answer is, no, I am not. I told family members not to read it. If they do anyway, I'm not responsible for their emotional scarring. Very few people in my "real" life know I'm Twenty Four At Heart, so hopefully no one will approach me to discuss sex toys on the street.
I'm not a sex toy expert, OK?
By the way? "Romance" parties are all the rage with women right now so I don't think any pictures I show here are very shocking to many people. Also, did you know the name of these parties has changed (at least here in California)? Women now get invited to Poke Her parties instead of Romance parties. Seriously.
As a quick side note, Joe the Bigamist called our mutual friend yesterday. He was wondering what he should do for Thanksgiving this year. I thought I'd pass that on because it made me laugh out loud. Life is bad when neither of your wives wants you home for the holidays.
My daughter, TR, is home from college for a few days. I'm looking forward to enjoying some time with her. I do have a Thanksgiving post that will be up tomorrow. You probably won't hear from me again after that until Monday. I've got a lot of cooking to do. And shopping. It's time for some mother/daughter bonding time. If you're going to be too busy tomorrow to check in, then please accept my best wishes for a wonderful Thanksgiving now. To my readers outside of the USA, thank you for your patience over the next few days as we celebrate our holiday!
For Jan- "[email protected] Does Money Town"- hahahaha!
And I like your post, dont find anything you write offensive at all!
Can you put a link to the sex cd up here- can you get it on Amazon? I want to know! Please email me if you can, cos that CD sounds HOT!
Posted by: SSG | November 26, 2008 at 03:21 AM
Yours will make a great biography some day... with your multifaceted, naughty and nice personality. It's wonderful the way you've blended the outrageous and the mundane in your blog... in a way that always makes us laugh. (Poke Her Parties, indeed!)
Enjoy a lovely Thanksgiving!!
Posted by: sometimessophia | November 26, 2008 at 04:56 AM
Don't worry about having nothing to post today. I'm still digesting yestedays post! (Gonna hafta get me one of them flippers)
Enjoy your Family hoilday and shopping with TR. See you next week!
Posted by: Linda | November 26, 2008 at 05:37 AM
Even when you say that you've got nothing for us today, you still manage to keep us entertained. Either that says a lot for you or it says very little for us. heehee
I'm sure I'll be checking in, but just in case I don't, I hope you have a fabulous Thanksgiving!
Posted by: Donna in VA | November 26, 2008 at 05:41 AM
The very reasons why you can go from talking about sex toys(and you did it so awesomely)to making cranberry relish and baking bread, are the reason's you are so loved around here. I am still smiling about your sex toys and yes, if you so happen to do a give away of a sex toy, I would be more than happy to enter such contest.
Seriously, I don't understand how anyone could be upset or frown upon you for writing about sex or sex toys. Sex is a wonderful thing and everyone should be enjoying it and or at least some sex toys. I tend to think that those that frown or are negative about it are those that don't know what their missing out on and need to take your post to heart and learn a thing or two or are too prudent(and jealous) to admit that they are human!
I seriously think people don't have enough sex or pleasure in their lives...I think there are a lot of sexually deprived people walking around and it makes them pretty damn cranky and miserable.
I hope you have a most wonderful time with your daughter being home...have lots of mother daughter fun together. Happy cooking & shopping and a very happy Thanksgiving to you and your family!
Posted by: Lori | November 26, 2008 at 05:45 AM
Sounds like Joe needs to get ANOTHER wife. Maybe this one will bake him a turkey.. oh, wait... Joe IS the turkey!
Di
The Blue Ridge Gal
Posted by: Di | November 26, 2008 at 06:20 AM
hahahah di and too true lori
Posted by: SSG | November 26, 2008 at 06:43 AM
Have the most wonderful holiday and Happy Thanksgiving! Love your blog here in Texas...
Posted by: wendy | November 26, 2008 at 07:15 AM
hahahahaha oh lordy. well first happy thanksgiving to you and yours!!!!!!!!!!! and second? poke her parties? wtf?
Posted by: Lo | November 26, 2008 at 07:25 AM
LOL We both posted "I got nothin'" posts today.
Btw, I gave you some linky love on my blog. :)
Posted by: Midlife Mama | November 26, 2008 at 07:29 AM
Wishing you a wonderful holiday, especially all that hanging out with your daughter.
BTW My husband, who shows so little interest in blogging that he has never read a single post of mine or anyone I read, actually turned his attention away from the TV while I chatted about your sex toy post.
And now I am off to work with the theme from Flipper prancing around my head.
Posted by: phhhst | November 26, 2008 at 07:31 AM
Trust and believe that a contest with a sex toy would be the best contest EVER! I'd enter...no pun intended.
Posted by: Mama Dawg | November 26, 2008 at 07:44 AM
Poke Her parties? That's rich!
Posted by: Jason | November 26, 2008 at 08:31 AM
see...i think this is more proof that the statistic about men thinking about sex more than women is just wrong...really wrong...
Posted by: thistle | November 26, 2008 at 08:41 AM
'Poke Her' parties? Really?? LOL! That just begs a line like, 'Did you hear about the woman that went to a poker party and ended up with a straight flush?' Or something like that, only funny.
Have a great day preparing for T-Day! We're doing the same up here.
Posted by: goodfather | November 26, 2008 at 09:09 AM
Poor Joe. He's going to be so lonely. I bet not even his own kids want to hang out with him the Rat Bastard.
Enjoy Turkey Day with your Fam. We're heading to my parents house tomorrow AM. I'm only in charge of the green bean dish. Woohoo! Going to Grandma's is like a mini vacation for me. I get to catch up on my reading & naps.
*See* you on Monday!
Posted by: Sandra | November 26, 2008 at 10:33 AM
I made you snort coffee all over your new notebook?
Ahhhhh, yes. My day is complete. :^)
And I still think it would be a, er, rock solid hit.
Posted by: Jan | November 26, 2008 at 12:45 PM
Does Briefcase read your blog?? How did he feel about the gifted sex toys? And the kids?! o_O
Anyway, Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours! I hope you have a good one. :)
(Maybe you should invite Joe? Then you could snag an interview!)
Posted by: Kristan Hoffman | November 26, 2008 at 02:27 PM
I am STILL laughing about the sex basket. DAMN, you're good!!!
Posted by: vodkamom | November 26, 2008 at 02:51 PM
I've never been to a romance party...or a sex party. Both sound like fun.
Posted by: Rhea | November 26, 2008 at 05:06 PM
Poke her party? Funny.
In Florida we just call 'em F**ckerware parties. (or maybe it's just the peeps I hang with)
Posted by: Binks | November 27, 2008 at 05:43 AM
thanks for the vote of confidence, but those flipper lyrics where not all from my head, had to do a lyrics search for them. although i did know most of them
still thinking the manufacturer should but the rights to that song.
Posted by: amyz5 | November 28, 2008 at 08:01 PM