Mother-In-Law From Hell

Mother-in-law issues are common, aren't they?  In fact, it's almost unusual when people talk favorably about their in-laws.  I've heard a lot of stories over the years, but I witnessed an incident last weekend that floored me.  If any of you have a mother-in-law to top this one, I'd love to hear the story.

By the way, file this story under Money Town Shit I Couldn't Make Up If I Tried.

I was in the Money Town Starbucks.  

(Drum-roll please.  There is OFTEN drama at the Money Town Starbucks.)

Starbucks green iced tea has become my new addiction during our recent heat wave.  Of course, that has nothing to do with my story, does it?  

Also?

I had just come from a bikini wax.  Do you care?  That is an entirely separate story.  (But ouch!  But also, very sexy!)

In any case, Starbucks was pretty crowded.  I took my place at the end of a fairly long line.  I noticed a few people in front of me in line.  They were obviously together.  There were three in their group, a married couple and the husband's mother.  The couple were clearly irritating the hell out of each other.

You could see the tension in the air.  Anyone who has been married for any length of time also knows what it feels like.  There are times when your spouse just bugs you.

Maybe it was just the 108 degree day getting to them.  The husband seemed incredibly short tempered.  Finally he said, "Order me whatever you want I don't give a damn!" and he walked out.

I'm assuming he went out to wait in the car.  Maybe he walked home.  Who knows.

The wife seemed flustered and embarrassed because the entire Starbucks line had just witnessed their fight.

But no ... that was truly not the embarrassing part.

Because the mother in law?

The Mother-In-Law From Hell looked at her daughter-in-law with total disdain and said loudly enough for everyone to hear, "Are you pleasing my son in bed?  He wouldn't act like that if his needs were being taken care of!"

Oh.My.Gawd!

In Starbucks!

His needs?

If my mother-in-law considered my sex life her business I'd die.  If she discussed it in the Starbucks line I think I'd kill her on the spot.

I think my jaw must have hit the floor.  I visibly cringed with the woman's words.

The wife turned bright red in both anger and embarrassment.

Mother-In-Law From Hell didn't stop with that.

"My son needs to be taken care of and you clearly aren't fulfilling his needs!" she said angrily.

The wife looked like she was ready to die of humiliation and explode in anger simultaneously.  She looked up.  Her eyes met mine.  She turned her back on her mother-in-law and walked out of the coffee shop.  A minute later her mother-in-law scurried after her.

None of them ever ordered their coffees.

© Twenty Four At Heart

Comments

[Helena]

OMG! That is the worst I have ever heard. Ever!!!

[di]

I'm surprised they weren't on CNN that evening.... "This Just In.... Daughter In Law Shoots Husband, then strangles Mother In Law".

The mother in law truly deserved to be bitch slapped in public.

Snappy Di

[Kay]

I almost always have a MIL story to top whatever is being told... but not this one.
I would have ordered my damn coffee, and then thrown it in her face, right in the middle of Starbucks. What a bitch - I almost feel lucky now :)
At least my MIL makes comments like that behind my back, instead of to my face.

[Deidre]

Wow that's bad. Really, really bad. I am blushing with embarrassment - no literally. The Blush is creeping up my neck.

[Maureen@IslandRoar]

Wow, and I thought my passive-aggressive, judgmental ex mother in law was a bitch...
BTW, I've never had a bikini wax, always wanted to get one. My 18 year old would like to, but she's inherited her mother's "reticence" to expose herself this way. Is it worth it?

[Lori]

OMG that is horrible!!! My first mother-in-law talked in a similar fashion to me but I was very young and just took it from her. Now, if that happened there is no way in hell I would take it from her.

[Kristan]

OMFG. I don't have an MIL, but my boyfriend's mother is great. My mother's the one more likely to do or say something embarrassing. But nowhere NEAR that bad, holy cow...

[Jan]

If my MIL had said that to me, especially in line at Starbucks? I'd have looked the woman dead in the eye and said, "Well, it's kind of hard to satisfy a man with a dick the size of a baby's thumb, which I understand is a genetic disorder inherited from the mother's side of the family."

[Alan]

So...was she meeting his needs? I'd like to know...

[Be]

A better come back would be, "well, he has an Oedipal complex and if you ever met his mother you would understand"!

[Shay]

Ohmygosh, I pray her husband has the balls to stand up to his mother and put her in her place. God help that poor wife. Wow.

[Kelly]

LOL at Alan's comment. I'd predict this marriage is headed for divorce. What woman could handle a MIL like that? that is so, so BAD!

[Suzy Voices]

Holy crap! Definitely cannot top that!!!

[Lynette]

Wow! I am very lucky NOT to have had this kind of MIL. But if I did, I totally would have said that's not what he said this morning.

Also, the bikini wax? I love the look (HATE the pain). Still totally worth it.

[Enchanted]

Love Alan!

I don't have my own story but I can pass one on that happened to a friend of mine.

The family had a big bar-b-que with and her husband had eaten a lot of ribs. When everyone was finishing up their dinner his mother turned to my friend and said that she hoped she didn't plan on having sex that night because she didn't want her son to have a heart attack from all the pork he ate!
LOL From what I understand he didn't get any sex for a while after that.

[Enchanted]

Ok, please take "with" out after bar-b-que. -geesh- No wonder I never leave comments.

[Tara Bradford]

Stories like this make me a little relieved my MIL isn't around! What a terrible MIL! I feel sorry for the woman; doesn't sound like a marriage made in heaven.

[Mike Krause]

My spouse refuses to do bush control. The growth is pretty alarming. She doesn't care what I think. Maybe I could ask MIL to mention it? Not a good idea for a ton of reasons. No good options.

[The Queen of Chaos]

Oh. My. GOSH!

[Sarah]

HOLY COW. I think I would've slapped her. At the least. Maybe punched her in the throat. Mabye just called a lawyer, because.. obviously. Makes you wonder what the hell the woman says when she's NOT in the middle of a busy coffee shop!

My mil is insane. And alcoholic. And no one should EVER acknowledge either of these things, ever, for any reason. She is about 80 pounds soaking wet and constantly whines about the 5 pounds she just gained.

I used to feel sorry for her, and try to work with her issues. But I'm getting too old for that BS. My KIDS are too old for that BS. I think my husband might finally be getting something like kind of too old for that BS, and he's 11 years older than I am. He did just tell her off, again. Maybe this time it will stick.

[Kimberly]

Priceless!

I had a mother in law once. Loved her. Best gift giver, ever.

However, when her I told her, her son and I were getting a divorce, she asked me "are you a good wife?" and what she meant was - are you having sex with him. Fo real.

[Michelle Pixie]

Ahh MIL's ain't they GRAND! This made me feel *gasp* somewhat better with my impending visit with my MIL this weekend...because I would totally answer that question if she asked and I wouldn't put it past her. My MIL is constantly running her mouth but mostly to my poor hubs but there have been a few times she's opened her trap while I've been in ear shot...

Regarding the marriage license the day we got married ~ "Don't sign it! If you don't sign it, it won't be legal!" (Might I add she was drunk before the ceremony began and she's not a drinker.)

Two months after giving birth to my first daughter ~ "If you ever leave him he is going to take that baby away from you!"

Five months pregnant with my 2nd daughter ~ "Look how fat Michelle has gotten!" (Umm, in front of the whole family while we were getting off the plane and my 7 year old niece told me days later. And yes I confronted the MIL on that one.)

And just three days ago she told us that if we didn't make a trip to see his sister in the near future they (his parents) were not going to stop to see us as they drove through town to go to there winter RV spot. His sister has visited us all of twice in the 8 years we have been married and we make sure to visit her at least once a year and her kids are all older then mine, I think it might be easier for her to visit us since she doesn't have a baby?! But I am just the bitchy daughter-in-law!

OMG thanks so much for letting me get all of that out! I wanted to write a post about my peach of a MIL but I think they may read my blog and you know not really something I want to say without clueing her in first. Which if she's lucky she may get dialed in this weekend! ;)

[Allyson/@HBMomof2]

Wow, I think I would have said, "Yes, I am doing my part in the bedroom, but he keeps calling out 'Mommy'." Maybe that would have shut her ass up.

That being said, I have a MIL this cruel, but in a different way. She made sure that I got the small piece of breakfast bread because I am such a fat ass and announced it to the room full of family this past weekend on our YEARLY visit. (I ate only half - I showed her right?) I said nothing. Just waiting for her death.

I bet that was shocking to witness. I feel for her. It will continue to be a long and treacherous road ahead.

[Maura]

That poor, poor woman.

[Julie @ Angry Julie Monday]

Oh lord...I think I need to hang out more with you near Money Town. We can get pedicures, go to Starbucks, and listen to other people's conversations at lunch.

I got to sit next to "namedropper" while getting a pedicure today. She wanted everyone to know that her husband was in a band and he was on tour. I DON'T CARE! And OMG she was complete white trash.

[Jill]

Holy crap! I can't even imagine. I think I'd be tempted to slap a bitch in that situation.

I'm luck with my mother in law, but my father in law is pretty awful to me. I won't go into it here because I'm in a pretty good mood today and I don't want him ruining it for me, even virtually!

[dogmother]

This had me laughing all day....I actually even came up with a visual of what they might've looked like and I could hear them speaking...have you ever considered a video camera..this stuff is so rich! At least she can't be called "passive-aggresive"...that would be considered...assault! Damn! JC I am so boring compared to these people!

[Midlife Slices]

I love my mother in law and I'm so happy she never feels the need to discuss sex with me since she can't hear a damn thing and we both end up shouting just so she can follow the conversation. ha!

[Liz]

I hope she walked straight to a Lawyers office! lol!

[Only Aman]

If your MIL considered your sex life her business - would she charge for you? (um... just asking for um... business survey)

If my mom were still alive (she might be for all i know... ) and she said that to my wife - and I heard about it later - well... i wouldn't be in question of the previous statement. (i would have made sure she was gone).

Just ridiculous.

-Aman

[Kim @ Beautiful Wreck]

This is one great MIL stories, but let me tell you, that MIL has nothing on mine. Nothing. I can top that story. Not only top it, I could write a book of stories about my MIL but I will have to save them for another time.

I will however pray for this daughter in law, because she needs to get some ovaries. Had my MIL said that to me my response would have been "He seemed to be really pleased when I was sucking his cock off last night" and I would then had gone on to order my drinks.

And yes, I have said similar things to my MIL when she has attempted to embarrass me. The one is evil.

[LPC]

You are KIDDING me!

[Jack]

Hah, MILs are great blog fodder.

[sometimessophia]

Oooooh. Nasty. I feel sorry for the wife. What was she thinking when she married into that family? Does "sucks his mother's dick" qualify as grounds for divorce?

[Midgetwannabe]

my soon to be MIL has kicked both me and her son out of the house on 3 holidays, she has told the entire family hat the older bros gf is closer to being her DIL when she does not have a ring and i do, she got pissed at me when i had my own phone with me and not with my fiance at the hospital with the oldest son. the thing was is why the hell should he need the phone, if she should have gone with them to the f'in hospital in the first place and then had the nerve to call me a b**** and then call me selfish. and yet it seems that no matter what happens the fiance tries to help it, but she always does it again. so she needs to get a life and get over the fact that i am going to marry her son whether she likes or not. she will learn, it just better be fast.