I'm Sure You've Heard The One About ...

* Information for today's post was gathered from The Orange County Register and assorted other news sources. *

I put a link to a recent Orange County news article out on Twitter and Facebook last Tuesday.

Normally, I'd leave it at that but I'm having a difficult time shaking this one out of my brain.

One of this week's OC Register headline states, Wife slices off man's penis, police say.

I guess they have to add the "police say" because the woman allegedly sliced off her husband's penis.

(Who knows?  Maybe he drugged himself, tied himself to the bed, and then sliced it off with a knife all by himself?)

The wife, Catherine, told police her husband, "deserved it."

Of course he did Catherine.

Catherine and her husband have been married for less than two years.  He had filed for divorce in May, not long after their first anniversary, due to "irreconcilable differences."

In retrospect, that seems to simplify the situation a bit.

The story gets worse.

Catherine, allegedly, drugged her husband's food so he would fall asleep.

Next, she tied him to the bed.

Then?

Then ...

She waited for him to WAKE UP.

I guess she wanted him to see her cut off his dick with a ten inch kitchen knife.

Just when you think the story can't get any worse ...

Catherine decided to put her husband's penis in the garbage disposal and turn it on.

(He must have really been a lousy lover, don't ya think?  I mean, she had clearly decided there was absolutely no future use for it no matter how many roses he bought!)

(Also, garbage disposals are very expensive to replace.  Who would ever want to use that one again?  Cutting off a man's penis and then putting it into the garbage disposal is a very expensive proposition.)

Awhile later, Catherine called the police to tell them there was a medical emergency at her home.  

Sheesh Catherine!

She must be Queen of the Understatement.

Catherine was polite enough to greet the police at the door.  Her husband was still tied to the bed and "bleeding profusely from his groin."

The police filtered through the sink/garbage disposal for penis-parts, and apparently found some.  They gathered together what they could and then took the bits/pieces and Catherine's husband to the hospital for surgery.

In a follow-up story yesterday, the husband was asked for an interview but refused to discuss the situation saying, "This is a private matter."

??

Dude, the entire world knows about it.

It is, most definitely, NOT a private matter.

After surgery, the hospital reported the victim's condition as "good."

I somehow doubt that .....

© Twenty Four At Heart

Comments

[Di]

This is just sad. That anyone would do this to another human being is just sad.

[Kati]

OMG This is so shocking and horrifying you pretty much had to throw in some humor. really, as only you can. You made me laugh which is a good thing because OMG!!!

[Jan]

Well, it DID involve his privates...

Poor man. I guess when you're married to a psycho that would drug you, tie you to the bed, wait for you to wake up so she can cut off your penis then go and throw it in the ever-loving *garbage disposal*, your differences are pretty irreconcilable.

[mandy]

Its Lorana Bobbit all over again... but worse on so many levels. Allegedly, of course.

[sandi]

There is another side to this story and I want it! I know damn well that man was sticking his penis in places he shouldn't have been. Otherwise, I just don't see how or why she would resort to such behavior. Crimes of passion.... I believe in them.

[Linda]

No matter where he was sticking his private parts- she is a psycho bitch for what she did. If he was fucking around- leave him. If he was beating her- leave him and prosecute him. Cannot think of 1 possible justification- oh wait - if he was molesting a little girl or boy- maybe. hmmmm there must be a back story to this one.

[Jack @ TheJackB]

I heard he was a real dick, but he isn't now. On a serious note, it is pretty damn scary. Not that I ever expect that to happen to me, but when I read about it I prayed to G-d that if I am ever put in that situation to give me special powers.

You know, like the magical condom made of steel or maybe the ability to become as hard as a diamond. Actually that diamond thing could be kind of interesting, especially if a man were single.

But I'll save my wacky musings for my own blog....

[Rusti]

wow. I mean... wow. I can't really come up with much more to say.. WOW.

[Nancy P]

I just..just can NOT imagine someone doing that. And for her to wait around so calmly? WOW. unbelievable.

[Linda P]

Clearly she has some 'issues'. Hope she gets help in jail.

[Mike Krause]

Twentyfour has a bionic arm. Why not a bionic wang for this unfortunate soul?

[Joanne]

the ultimate reply when he wont "stop poking me with that thing"
they ought to make her stay married to him the rest of her life, that'll show her

[Serial Swooper]

That is one crazy pissed-off beeyatch. Holy cow.

I guess pretending to be asleep when he came to bed wasn't working for her?

[Mrs4444]

Wow. Just wow.